Friday, June 20, 2008
I love DART, I do. When I worked at the Dallas Morning News, I rode it nearly every day, because you could choose between a DART pass or a parking spot. Parking spots at 508 Young are - even after two rounds of buyouts - rare. Even on the alleged priority list, I was still waiting for a space on the lot to open up, and paying for parking in the meantime. So I eventually opted for the DART pass. I lived about two blocks from a light rail station, and a 20 minute ride to Union, which put me right across the street from the office. Perfect. When I needed to cover something in the Park Cities, I just hopped the train back to the house, grabbed my car, and was there in no time flat - without having to do that scary "try to cross five lanes of traffic to get in the correct lane, oh crap is that a semi, eff, eff, eff, eff..." thing on Woodall Rogers. So maybe I should say I love DART light rail. The buses are another matter. I'm freakin' scared of the buses. I drive behind them, around them, near them on my commute every day. I've ridden in them in shuttle form when going to the State Fair, because I'd rather be chewed by rabid baby hamsters than try to park and navigate the traffic there. And every time, I think I might die. It's not the patrons, it's the weird-ass navigation, combined with the distinct feeling that the driver thinks he's behind the wheel of a Jetta, not a huge death-dealing machine of doomy catastrophe. And that's what he should be thinking: "Every turn I make could bring my passengers and the five cars next to me closer to their untimely demise - I should be careful." Not: "Isn't it a great day to be driving my secret Go-Go Gadget spy mobile? Watch as I freak the crap out of this nice lady in a Hyundai next to me by riding the white line to my left THE ENTIRE BLOCK. Isn't that funny? I'm bigger than this So-Sucky Forenza, so I think I'll just go ahead and switch lanes, regardless of whether or not you slow down, because once you see me, YOU WILL SLOW DOWN. Now I'm going to screw with my passengers who just want to get to the Fair by taking this curb on my right tires only! Don't pee my seats, bitches!" So I guess, what I'm saying is things like this don't really surprise me.