Things I've Discovered Today

1. It doesn't matter how soft the Kleenex is - if you wipe your nose every five minutes because it's trying to drip on your keyboard, eventually your nose hurts. 2. You don't have to wipe as much if you just cram the Kleenex up in the offending orifice. It also means you can be more productive while sick. 3. If you sneeze hard enough, you can blow a wadded up Kleenex onto the bookshelves across the room, if it is a not that big room. 4. You can eat too many cranberries. 5. Hot beans with a dash of cajun seasoning will clear your nasal passages long enough for you not to sound like Elmer Fudd during a business call. 6. The dog does whatever I want if I tell him to do it in a certain tone. 7. It never quit raining. NEVER. 8. We have a creepy squirrel that sits in the tree by our house and stares in the office window. All day. 9. It's possible to trip over the same thing five times in the same hour. 10. Inhalers taste like feet.